10 things you DON'T say to alternatives

Here's a list of things not to say to alternatives. Hell, she could be dressed up as a frickin' doll for all I care. Don't say any of these things:

1. Why do you dress like that?

Why do you dress like that?

2. It's not good to dress like that, you know.

I have heard this many times, especially in islamic circles. Mostly from people I've never seen before. If you don't know the person, please don't try to give them advice. It's rude. And, if the person is dressed decently, your statement makes no sense.

3. Just generally acting uncomfortable when the person makes a statement about what they like.

You aren't the world authority on what's right and wrong, so shut up.

4. You would be so pretty if you wore different things! (or generally suggesting clothes you can easily see the person will hate. You're too obvious, so shut your pie hole.)

I look pretty by my standards! Stop telling me to 'be myself' if you're trying to change what I define as myself.

5. Do you worship satan? while you creepily try to stare into the depths of my soul

No, I worship one god just like you. Or did the scarf I'm wearing on my head lead you to believe that I sold my soul to the devil?

6. Don't wear that. People will think you worship the devil.

If I cared what people thought, I wouldn't dress like this, sweetheart.

7. Can you not wear those when you go out with me?

Can you not go out with me? Like, never?

8. Why don't you like pink/pastel/whatever the person thinks is pretty/?

It's okay if you've legitimately never seen a goth/punk/whatever. It's not okay if you have that uncomfortable grimace that makes you look like you're constipated. If I make you uncomfortable, stop calling me.

9. Are you one of those depressed emos?/Do you cut yourself?

Number one, that's stereotypical, because not all emos are 'depressed'/cut. Number two, even if I did, do you really think it's your business? Do you think one glance at me evaluates my entire character?

10. Wow! You're wearing colour! Does this mean you'll stop dressing like a freak?/Aren't you supposed to be all depressed?

Right now you're being a freak. Because you don't know when to shut up. I can wear whatever I want to and I should be able to do it without you going off like a fire siren every time I go out of my comfort zone.

Hope this helped, although it probably didn't.

Moji.

Don't judge. Really.

Now, being alternative, I get a lot of stares in public. I don't mind so much and I'm mostly used to it. I know most people judge me by how I dress and that's part and parcel of being different. I can say, honestly, that when I look at someone, I form an opinion on them based on a cursory glance and that's a fact I've grown to be very ashamed of.

I travel a lot, so that means I see a lot of different people. People I form judgements subconsciously, whether I like it or not. Once, on a night flight from Bangkok to Islamabad, I was seated in front of a young gentleman.

He was definitely older than myself. Me, being a teenager, he looked to be around twenty to twenty five years of age. Mind you, I was decked out in my full (what I consider full, at least) punk attire. I was wearing a black abaya, the buttoned cuffs of which clearly displayed my leather spiked bracelets as well as a black scarf and denim waistcoat.

I was in no position judge anyone based on how they were dressed. And I did. I wish to god that I hadn't, but I did.

The aforementioned (pakistani) gentleman sitting behind me had his hair dyed a light shade of orange. He had a goatee and he was wearing a waistcoat over his shirt. I assumed that he must not be very religious. It was subconscious. I can't remember when the actual thought ran through my head. Maybe it didn't. But it was something there at the back of my mind.

I was tired, this was a transit from Singapore. I'd been travelling all day and would remain in the air for most of the night. I settled down to sleep. I heard snatched of the conversation between the man and his seat-mate. Later, I heard him quietly reciting the dua for travelling. Then the three quls. And then some other suras of the quran.

I was so ashamed. I'd really judged this man wrongly. He was, in all honesty, a better muslim than I was. I usually forget to recite the dua for travelling. Forget the dua for travelling, I forget to recite any of the duas I'm supposed to. I go on on and on about not judging me for how I look, yet I just wrongly formed an opinion of someone I'd never met, never talked to, never known.

Ever since then, I make a conscious effort to tell that little voice in the back of my head to shut up. 

If you're reading this, stranger-who-I-judged, I'm sorry. I shouldn't have and you kind of made me revise my whole thinking process.

Byeee, Moji.

The Creature

I've always loved to be different, and recently I've become more and more into the Goth-Punk subculture. When I first started dressing like a crazed demented psycopath, I really wasn't sure where to buy my accessories. Unfortunately it took me a while to realise that I may not have had to spend a cent. To help you with your fashion journey, I thought I'd do a series on how to DIY your own fashion ensemble.

Essential No. 1

Writlets

All you really need for these are some of those cheap T-Shirt material under-sleeves. You have a few options; you could rip them creatively, like these awesome ones here:

Or, if that's not hardcore enough for you, you can put safety pins all over them too. Here's one I made myself.

Becoming B.A
(Boscoe Alan Baracus)

I've been dubbed 'The child of B.A Baracus'. I layer the bracelets and rings. My family hates it. I love it.

No, you say to yourself. I don't look like that. I don't wear that much. I don't look that threatening. One day you will look in the mirror and have an epiphany. About two things;

1. You do look like that.
2. You don't mind.

Here's my take on the punk B.A look

I have a denim waist coat, which, if you're going for the Baracus, is a must-have.

Rings

I like to get a little Wanda Maximoff with my rings. The trick is rose-gold pinkie rings and a lot of eclectic metals.

Gunmetal and huge skull rings look great too, if you like the biker look. Just pick what works best for you.

Cuffs/Bracelets

A must have of every punk; spikes. Spikes, spikes, spikes. It becomes an obsession. I cannot resist passing up anything spiky anymore, much to the consternation of my family. Here's why I'm a bit of a black sheep;

Makeup



I don't wear any outrageous makeup, but here are some gorgeous looks if only for inspiration

Piercings


The one piercing I would really love is a septum nose piercing, but, since I'm underaged I have to wait till I'm 18.

Other piercings include shark tooth piercings-on the lower lip, in the same place as your canines-, canine piercings-on the top lip, in the same place as your canines-, jestrum piercings, bridge piercings, etc.

For those of you who would love piercings, but are underage, here are some great alternatives;

And if these are too girly or hipster for you, don't worry! There are loads of other, more taseful ones out there. I just couldn't dig up any good pics. Shops like Lovisa, Accessorieze or Claire's may have what you're looking for if you know what to ask for. It's all a matter of luck. For instance, I got a huge set of gunmetal earcuffs from Lovisa for a song. You just have to keep going back.

Jestrum:

Bridge: